My thoughts right now.

I don't even want to know what blake thinks about me. I am so emotional and all over the place. my poor boys. I was reading this girls blog that i don't know and i just started bawling... this is why. She was talking about how her 2 year old son was so sick. He had thrown up 23 times that night and was still going. They called their dr and he said that they could only give him tsps full of water at a time. She goes on to say how he was crying and begging her to give him more and she felt so horrible that she couldn't give him what he wanted so badly. Then she says how whe thought about how Heavenly Father must feel the same way. We beg him and beg him to give us what we want and he can only give us what we need, and it breaks his heart to hear us begging for something that he can't give. She also said that she had to switch off with her husband because it was so hard for her, and then she went in the other room and cried because she felt so bad. She related that to Heavenly Father too, how she knows that Heavenly Father is up in heaven crying for us too. When we aren't doing things right or are struggling he just wants to pick us up and comfort us and make all the hurt go away. I seriously wanted to copy her blog and keep it. It was incredible. I am so thankful for all that i have and for what is growing inside of me. I know that family is so important to Heavenly Father and i am so grateful that i can have a family. I am so glad that i have a supportive family that doesn't mind me calling daily. (no exaggeration) and that they are concerned about me. I am very blessed for my sis in laws and bro in law. I don't have sisters but they are mine for sure. I am very lucky for my parents and the example that they have been to me. My dad has shown me what it is like to have a worthy priesthood holder in your home and the comforts that it can have along with his loving arms. My mom is my best friend... don't you worry i am crying while i am writing this... thank goodness that blake is gone to wash the truck. She knows everything about me and has been there for everything. I love you two very much. My Mom, and Dad Brower are such a blessing too. They have welcomed me into their family and treat me like their daughter. I love them too. I just want to end this novel by saying how much i love my husband and how much i have enjoyed having him home. He is a wonderful father and Brody idolizes him. I am very blessed and thankful for all i have.